Kopi Kaki: 50 Shades of Law

15 May 2017

[Warning, some of these questions are a bit provocative, and deal with laws on "adult-themed" offences.] 
This quiz is framed as a hypothetical raunchy conversation at a kopitiam among friends. Singapore gets a bad reputation for some of our laws. This cannot do, that cannot do - and sometimes people aren't sure what they can and cannot do so they just make stuff up. How many of these are real laws, and how many are just misperceptions? 

Kopi Kaki: Eh Uncle - two kopi-o for me and my friend hor. 
You: I need a kopi man. Last night had a late night at Clarke Quay.
Kopi Kaki: Why you go Clarke Quay?! Eh you tourist issit?
You: Aiyah in Singapore party also cannot go too wild. So many laws until everything also cannot do!
Kopi Kaki: Yeah lor. Eh, I got lots of scandal stories to share with you... Drink kopi then I talkcock ok?

1. Eh, got hear or not? My girl and I went to watch 50 Shades of Grey - wah damn shiok movie la. I ask her to go buy handcuff so at home also can play - but she say cannot because will sure kena catch by police on the way home!
It is illegal for ordinary people to carry handcuffs in public

2. Eh, you believe or not? After shower I like to walk around my bedroom naked hor, but my girl say cannot because neighbour can see me from window.
It is illegal to be naked at home if you can be seen by members of the public (e.g. from the opposite flat through your window).

3. Eh, my fren say next week got costume party so she want to come dressed as sexy soldier and wear my old SAF uniform. How - you want to dress like policeman, I dress like special forces... should be ok right?
Dressing in SAF military uniform is acceptable at private parties (i.e. clearly unofficial activities).

4. Eh, be careful hor. Next time you go to large outdoor party at night cannot be in groups of more than 5 people in public otherwise police can accuse you of illegal gathering!
An assembly of 5 or more people can be considered an 'unlawful assembly' after 10pm.

5. Eh, my girl tell me that Section 377a law dun only catch the gays hor, also can catch normal couples because she say any oral and anal sex all illegal one!
Section 377a of the Penal Code criminalises oral and anal sex between all consenting adults, including heterosexual couples, if it does not lead to normal intercourse.

6. Eh, got hear or not? Last time I read one case where the woman say she raped another girl, but the judge say that only man can rape woman, woman cannot rape anybody. Believe or not? 
Only a male can rape somebody, by definition in Singapore laws.

7. Eh, believe or not? I read the news about this guy in Singapore tie up and force his own wife to have sex - damn sicko. But the judge say cannot charge him with rape because Singapore husband cannot rape wife. 
A husband cannot be charged with rape against his wife if they are living together, under the current definition of rape in the Penal Code.

8. Eh got see the news or not? That idiot who push the uncle in the Toa Payoh hawker stall kena arrested for public nuisance. But actually my mata friend said police cannot normally arrest on the spot if the fight is in private venue, so the couple stupid to fight in public.
The police cannot arrest someone for causing (minor) harm to another person in a private apartment even if the police are outside.

9. Eh, my friend tell me if gangster come to hamtam (hit) you ah, better not defend yourself. Better siam (run) la! In Singapore even if you defend yourself by fighting back is also considered illegal!
In Singapore, defending yourself against an attack by fighting back is also considered criminal behaviour.

10. Eh, remember last time that sex case where the prostitute was only 17 but lie to all her many online clients that she was 18? The judge also said is partly her fault for lying to the men so they don't know her real age, so not the guys fault totally la.
If an adult male above 21 years old has commercial sex with a female under 18 and argues that "he did not know she was below 18" or "she lied about her age", then he may be able to use that as a defence in court.

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